Who am I?

 

“Who am I??”

 Lately this question has been looming inside my head occupying the space for my free thoughts. There is no determining reason so as to ponder on this question. Or maybe the underlying fact that there is no reason is the reason for this uncanny state of my mundane mind.

So, who am I really??? Am i everything that you see?Am I the sum total of everything that has happened to me. Am I my name,family or the schools i attended?Am I my religion? Am I my graduate degree certificate or am I my profession? Am i that little girl trimmed and groomed by the society?Am i the friends i made  and the people I know? Am i my achievements and the mistakes that i have made? Am i the responsible daughter and the good sister or the loving wife? Am I the music that I hum to and the beats that I tap to? Am I the words that I speak  or the dreams I sleep to?Am i the reflection of everything that i have seen, done and learned?

 Or am I everything that I didnot do or everything that i am not?

 Am I the brave girl who dreams of traveling far and wide, befriended the pirates and shared their rum, am I the fair princess who lived in the golden palace, am I  lad riding the dragons and singing the song of victory, am I the nun vowed to help the sentient beings, am I the beggar scavenging food from dogs, or am I the thief or a murderer with vile, venomous  thoughts, am i the pretty sluts with fake smiles and white hearts, am i the stinking sick bastard, am i the poet with an unquenching lust for beauty and words,  am i the kings who promised and failed? Am i everything i could not be?

Eventually how do i sum up? which one is it? am i everything i did or everything i did not? or maybe both? Or am I just flesh and blood hanging on the beats of my heart? As confusing as it sounds but once my ashes mix with the dirt then who am I really?????